Mother and Child

Last week, my flatmate and I decided to have a movie night. We huddled up on the sofa and decided to watch a movie. We hadn’t done that in a long time and it was Saturday night and after a long hard day of doing uni work we decided to take the evening off. We decided to watch Mother and Child. This was a beautiful film about 3 families and their different experiences of motherhood.

The story began with 14 year old Karen who after having sex for the first time finds herself pregnant. She decides to give her baby up for adoption, a decision which will stay with her and affect much of her adult life. Karen grows up and as an adult tends to the care of her frail and elderly mother. She is unhappy and lonely and often thinks about the child she gave up long ago.

Then we meet Elizabeth. She is hard working, career driven, successful and independent. She was given up for adoption and has a bad relationship with her adoptive mother. She is strong and solitary and an in my eyes an inspiring character. She talks of her childhood and how she was never ever ‘part of sisterhood.’ Girls were often intimidated by her and didn’t like her. She had multiple casual sexual relationships in her adult life to stem her loneliness including with her widowed boss. They develop feelings for each other. She becomes pregnant and decides to bring up the baby, despite being unsure who the father is.

Then we meet Lucy, a married woman who is unable to conceive and decides she wants to adopt. But after a failed adoption arrangement and her husband’s lack of enthusiasm about adoption in general, her marriage ends, with him leaving her. The 3 three main characters are not all unique in their experiences but the uniqueness in the characters are what gets them through the troubled times. They are all very different but it’s interesting to see how your experiences give you the strength to deal with anything. As human beings we are constantly adapting and learning and changing.

Elizabeth is my favourite character. She was played by the amazing Naomi Watts who conveys with such conviction Elizabeth’s strength and independence. What I loved about Elizabeth was that she was a no ‘b*******’ kinda girl who wasn’t going to take any nonsense from anyone. She was always the outsider but made a life for herself though her sheer strength and determination. She was always judged by others through life and hated when people made assumptions about her when they didn’t even know her. To the outsider, she appears cold and disconnected but that was a result of years of disappointment and upset. It was so nice to see this character unravel throughout this movie. To see how happy she was when she became pregnant and was given a new lease of life and hope. Although she was alone and had no close family or friends to speak of, she didn’t let affect her. She just carried on with life and didn’t mope or feel sorry for herself. This shows such courage and inner strength.

Lucy’s story began with such heart breaking experiences. She was unable to conceive naturally and that made her feel ’worthless.’ She couldn’t have the one thing that she wanted. To see her pain and to know that fertility can sometimes be luck of the draw was such a harsh reality. As human beings the need to reproduce is a carnal human need. Some people say that’s our ultimate purpose on earth to continue the race. Some people are so lucky and can conceive straight away. Some people conceive without even trying while others struggle and that affects their relationships. Fertility can be cruel and unfair and your luck can affect your life’s course. Some women say that you haven’t lived until you become a mother and that that’s the most fulfilling thing you can do. Others say that for those who decide not to have children you have the opportunity to fulfil your full potential as a human being. Especially in today’s society after so many changes with women getting more rights, women have so many more opportunities. It’s possible now for a woman to achieve so much more than was possible just a few decades ago.

This was a really beautiful film that was so inspiring. With a bitter sweet ending, this is such a great film that highlights the harsh reality of the difficulties that people go through in life. It also shows how as humans we have the remarkable capability to grow strength and courage and can deal with so much and still retain our inner strength.